A Stranger to Me

Is it to symbolize the start of a dream?
she’s a stranger to me.
If life’s to be a constant redeem,
I may be tempted by a light or a gleam.

I wish there would come a change, yet :
she’s a stranger to me.

There are days when you just can’t keep from crying.
My babe, expects me to fall on my knees and plead
for some more loving – that’s odd kind of loving - and I fail
to understand what she wants it to be - since I declare I satisfy all potential needs and yet
she treats me so unkind and so wickedly I just can’t do nothing but try to flee.

she’s a stranger to me, even though I know her a little more now,
she just won’t treat me any better than a friend…

All the things she pulls on my mind - such as responsibilities -
just push me aside from reality. Real being free.
My mind’s so used, abused, from what she makes me bear, can’t stand it anymore,
that’s kind of weird, I mean : she’s made a fool out of me !

Is it to symbolize a dream?
she’s a stranger to me.
If life’s to be a constant redeem,
I sure refuse to sacrifice my life for a bet or some queer.

I thought there would come a change, yet :
she’s a stranger to me.

Though I ain’t dumb, yet she attracts me_ some strange kind of loving she wouldn’t agree.
It’s no real love and yet it’s the way I feel. She’s not the one, I’m possessed, I could not run away from her damned charm, cause she’s taken me in a spiritual net, that’s all I might guess
from the way I reckon all she says connects her to my senses.

she’s a stranger to me, although I know now,
we won’t get any further, hope keeps me hanging on…

Cruel is the truth when it comes to proofs : she relies on my elbows and makes me blue,
treats me like shit when friends come close. I just can’t handle it no more !
And if I tried to free myself from her charms ; well that’s what reflection brings about.

I believe there ain’t nothing better than rough solitude, and if I changed my attitude,
would she finally leave me alone ? Is this what I want ? While sorrow bleeds, water still flows...
and I can’t keep from denying that’s what life’s about.

The weight’s growing heavier day after day, she blows my spirit away and throws me into despair. 

As for me : I care, I care, I care.
Gave her all plus the best of what I am : apprehension, admiration, perhaps too much
and all through the while I’ve learned, and realized : I still have so much to learn.

I believe

I’ve been way too romantically mistaken to believe in a love at first sight, 

and ever since I can’t get her out of my mind. 

Some kind of vicious circle, lecherous circle, or call it as you like !
An odd attraction to someone who owns you but despises you the more you know her and you cannot realize she’s not the one, but you are stuck for life.

Is it to symbolize the end of a dream?
she’s a stranger to me.
If life’s to be a constant redeem,
I sure refuse to sacrifice my life for a fight for esteem.

I thought there would come a change, yet :
she’s a stranger to me.

And that’s the end of my dream,
yet I keep on living, we’ll see…




P. S. à propos of nothing : I knew it from the start;
if you can’t laugh with your lover the trip would be kind of hard.
Two railroad tracks laying side by side but the one is rising the other tumbling down:
and this is our lives since we’re opposed like black and white _
our only link and reason for being had been this blank page













a world of stone and of shattered dreams
a world that breaks our nerves and our souls’ esteem
a world of waiting and everlasting expectations:
begging, pleading for love and love & love; ends love.
a world of unknown & denied future
where the present time is the sole esteem
so used to waiting and craving for longing
to find the true significance of love & fear.

March, 13th 2000.

©2000 Matt Oehler